Showing posts with label Santa n Banta. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Santa n Banta. Show all posts

Mouthwash

Santa (reading from book of facts): "Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?"

Banta: "Why don't you use a mouth wash?"

Santa and exams

Q: Why was Santa writing the exam near the door?

A: Because it was an entrance exam.


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Santa: My dad was an extremely brave man. He once entered a lion's cage.

Banta: He probably got a lot of applause when he got out.

Santa: I didn't say he got out.

santa and banta

Banta: Name the 3 fastest means of communication.

Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman



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Santa: I'm a proud father. My son is in medical college.

Banta: What's he studying?"

Santa: He's not studying, they are studying him!

Santa and Platform.

Santa standing on platform suddenly jumps on the railway track.

Banta: Santa u'll die.

Santa: U'll die bcoz haven't u heard train is coming on platform?

santa and banta

Banta: Name the 3 fastest means of communication.

Santa: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman



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Santa: I'm a proud father. My son is in medical college.

Banta: What's he studying?"

Santa: He's not studying, they are studying him!

Santa's Wife

Santa: I kiss my wife everyday before leaving for office, what about u?

Banta: Me too, after u leave.

Santa n Judge

Santa was caught for speeding and went before the judge.

The judge: What'll you take 30 days or Rs 3000.

Santa: I think I'll take the money.

Dog n Mother Tngue

Q: Why dogs don't marry?

A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!

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Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad, what should I write against mother tongue.?

Santa: Very long!

Santa Letter to Nurse...

Santa falls in luv with a nurse...
After much thinking,
he finally writes a love letter to her:
"I luv u sister."

Banta SIngh to Bill Gates

Letter is from Banta Singh of Punjab to Mr. Bill Gates of Microsoft
Subject: Problems with my new computer
Dear Mr. Bill Gates,

We have bought a computer for our home and we have found some
problems, which I want to bring to your notice.

1. There is a button 'start' but there is no 'stop' button. We request you to check this.
2. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friends clicked 'run' he ran up to Amritsar ! So, we request you to change that to 'sit', so that we can click that by sitting.

3. One doubt is whether any 're-scooter' is available in system? I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.

4. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost the door key and we tried a lot trace the key with this ' find' button, but was unable to trace. Please rectify this problem.

5. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft sentence', so when you will provide that?

6. I brought computer, CPU, mouse and keyboard, but there is only one icon which shows 'MY Computer': when you will provide the remaining items?

7. It is surprising that windows says 'MY Pictures' but there is noteven a single photo of mine. So when will you keep my photo in that.

8. There is 'MICROSOFT OFFICE' what about 'MICROSOFT HOME' since I use the PC at home only..

9. You provided 'My Recent Documents'. When you will provide 'My Past Documents'?

10. You provide 'My Network Places'. For God shake please do not provide 'My Secret Places'. I do not want to let my wife know where I go after my office hours.

Regards,

Banta

Sardar and Animals !!!!

TEACHAR : tell me 5 water animals.

SARDAR : fish

TEACHAR : good, next 4

SARDAR : fish da puttar, fish di kudi, fish da pra aur usdi MAA.......

Salary Expected

Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He

was not sure as to what to be filled in column "Salary Expected".

After much thought he wrote : Yes!

Terrorist Attack!!!


Statistics of Terrorist Attack

Last Painting


The last Painting of Santa Sing....

Oil

Santa starts shouting in a store...... where is my free gift with this
oil?

Shopkeeper : there is nothing free with this

Santa: it is written CHOLESTROL FREE

Imagination

INTERVIEW : Imagine, in a closed room , how can you escape if it caught fire?

Santa: Simple, stop imagining

Liquid State

In aptitude test... Nile River is in which state?
Santa: liquid state

Santa and Windows !!!

Santa to salesman : I want a pink curtain for my computer screen.

Salesman: But sir computers dont need curtains.

Santa: Hello.. I got 'Windows' !!

Santaa...

1. Santa on cycle hit lady accidently, lady says break nahi mar sakta tha?
Santa : Poori cycle to mar di...ab break alag se maroon kya?

2. Santa standing below a tube light with an open mouth.... WHY?
Because his doctor advised him, aaj light hi khana!!